“My breastfeeding relationship has been all about learning and working.
With my daughter I was in agony for ten weeks. We never really worked out why. But I kept going and suddenly it became pain free. So we carried on to three months, then six, then a year and then I couldn’t see a point in stopping when it was now so easy and such a great parenting tool. It calms tantrums (toddler and beyond!) so quickly and easily, offers comfort, and is a space to just be for both of us. Now she’s six it’s infrequent. Her adult teeth are coming in, her jaw shape is changing. She actually can’t get milk any more. But still asks to nurse to reconnect, chill out, and just be close. She will stop when she’s ready.
I didn’t plan this. I told a friend “I’m not going to be like you, feeding a child at school”, but actually it’s easy and natural and normal (biologically speaking) and the gift of natural term weaning is one of the greatest I can give to my child.
My son is 16 months, still tiny and loves feeding. He had a tongue tie so it was very hard for the month before it was cut. Painful, with him not getting enough. One day we had no wet nappies at all. But I kept going and trusted my body and once the tie was cut he latched on and within a few days would suck for comfort and not just food. It felt like a miracle. But then birth and breastfeeding are miracles.
I feed in public. Any time, anywhere. I walk around places with my boy in my arms, latched on, while I chat to people, order coffee, tidy up, whatever. I fed my daughter in public till she was three, then I felt conscious. But this time I will feed in public longer. I feel more confident about natural term weaning now.
I love being able to tandem feed. Sometimes they hold hands. Sometimes my son tries to unlatch his sister, poking his finger in her mouth, or pokes her eyes. He shares his boobs reluctantly!
My mum fed me till I was five months. I didn’t ever consider any other way to feed my babies. I trust my body to feed them. Formula was never an option. I have friends who would wet nurse for me, and I for them, if it was ever necessary.
My advice to others? Just do it. Other people’s opinions don’t matter. Not even your partner’s. Get the right support and do what’s right for you and your child.”